SPIRIT OF ISLAM NOVEMBER 2019

40 Spirit of Islam Issue 83 November 2019 MAKING THE RIGHT CHOICE Utmost Care Needed If you follow the path of vindication, it fans the ego of the other party, whereas if you follow the policy of forgiveness, it will activate the conscience of the other person. E VERY day in our life, we perhaps have some kind of bad experience, big or small. There is no escape from such experiences. One has two options: either to ignore them or to react. The first option is a form of forgiveness, while the other amounts to engagement and in some cases, even revenge. Which is the better option? We have to decide by looking at the result, for that is the determining factor. Forgiveness is a better option for it is based on a proven formula: ‘Save yourself’. Forgiveness saves you from distraction, it saves your time, and it saves you from creating more problems. Forgiveness could amount to an instant solution to the problem. In contrast, reaction and emotional revenge means turning the bad into worse, for revenge tends to worsen the problem. If forgiveness is buying time, revenge is just wasting time without hope of any positive result. In such a situation people generally tend to give in to negative thinking but such a reaction would be unwise. The better formula is following a self-oriented course of action. In other words, if you are having a sad experience, don’t think about the other party who you feel has wronged you. Think about your own self and adopt a course of action that is better for you. At all times in our life, we are torn between two choices—anti-other-thinking and pro-self-thinking. Anti-other- thinking makes you descend to the lowest level, whereas pro-self- thinking elevates you to a higher plane of consciousness. If forgiveness is a full stop, revenge is full of commas. Forgiveness means ending an unwanted situation, while revenge means extending it to infinity. Forgiveness maintains your positive thinking uninterruptedly, while revenge creates negativity. And negativity creates all kinds of undesirable behaviour, in terms of both thought and action. Some would argue that forgiveness does not always work, and that it is better to adopt the tit-for-tat policy. They argue that forgiveness